Television

Gossip Girl 6×09: Scammers, schemers and a bff who’s brilliant at playing dumb

Gossip Girl 6x09: The Revengers

Gossip Girl 6×09: The Revengers

You can say what you want about Gossip Girl, but this episode certainly made you smile! (Yes, of course the ending was ridiculous, but at least it didn’t make you cry.)

1. What just happened?!
It’s the penultimate episode of Gossip Girl, which completely focused on the Battle of the Basses. Luckily for us it’s not a snooze fest anymore. We start with a noir dream sequence of Blair as Mrs. Bass who runs into Bart. When she wakes up it seems to be the day to take Bart down – something to do with his upcoming Man of the Year title. The plan to use Nate’s mole part to steer Bart in the wrong direction fails and ends up having their best friend spending time in prison. Luckily for Nate his girlfriend Sage called The Captain (a pleasant surprise). In the meantime Chuck visits his father, but he runs into a sit down between Dan and Bart. Bart demands of Chuck to leave everything and everyone behind for the safety of his loved ones. After a dramatic goodbye at the airport between Chair we see Blair instruct the best schemers and scammers (Ivy, Sage and Georgina) she know and her best friend Serena to take down Bart. When that fails at the Man of the Year party Blair finds out that a Bass plane crashed – most likely the one that Chuck was on. But wait a second! Dan introduces his big inspiration and tada! There is Chuck exposing his father as the man who tried to kill is own son. Security leads him away (apparently to the roof, where all the major GG scenes happen). Our BFFs have a heart to heart about S leaving town. Dan tries to win Serena back and to stop her from going to L.A.. Blair rushes to the roof to find Chuck and Bart fighting. Which ends in Bart begging for Chuck’s hand to save him from falling down the building. Chuck and Blair refuse and we see Bart Bass die for real this time. Ow before I forget: Sage suggest to Nate to start digging into the whole Gossip Girl story again, because this time he has nothing to lose when he pursues this story. TO BE CONTINUED!

2. What was the most memorable quote or dialog this episode?
The showstopper scene of the week, was of course Blair prepping the other four girls to take down Bart. Never thought that would be so exciting and funny when I read it in the spoilers a few weeks ago. Here is the whole dialog!

Blair: “I have called you all here because you are the most conniving group of scammers and schemers that I know. And, Serena, you’re my best friend.”
Serena: “Thanks for clarifying. I still don’t understand why Georgina’s here.”
Georgina: “You can’t have an evil cabal without the queen of con. And frankly, I should’ve been given more notice.”
Sage: “You lost your royal status when I took your phone at cotillion.”
Georgina: “Ha. Phone stealing? Seriously? That’s the training bra of treachery.”
Blair: “Enough! If I wanted infighting, I would’ve called my minions. Now I need her here. I need you all here to use your dastardly skills to take down Bart Bass.”
Ivy: “Yeah, but last time we did that, Nate ended up in jail.”
Blair: “Do you want to go back to being the goat or lend your impersonation prowess to my plan?”
Serena: “Blair, are you sure Chuck would want you involved in his war?”
Blair: “It’s not his choice. Now I want you all to get Bart talking. And record him on your phones. We’ll merge your master manipulations, your wanton disregard for authority, and your brilliance at playing dumb. Bart Bass may be able to fool the FBI, but he has never had to face off against Blair Waldorf and her bitches.”

Also points for this Blair Waldorf line: “Yes, this is Blair Waldorf. Apparently, my town car has been absconded by a ruthless billionaire. So if you’d please send another… preferably with a different, less devious driver…”

3. Cuteness vs. Useless
+ After all these years Blair dreams are still happening in a noir setting. Nice continuity.
+ The Captain showing up for Nate. Finally someone takes his daddy duties seriously on GG, Nate only had to face jail time for it. The thing I didn’t get, is how they “solved” the problem in the end. But whatever, Nate looked handsome (and that’s his main job on the show, if we are all being honest).
+ I should give some points for Ivy saying this: “Am I the only one who didn’t study Byzantine warfare?” Because of course our UES-ers know Byzantine warfare, they used to go to one of the most prestige private schools.
+ Blair pointing out every girls part on the show. She is the only one who can make a mean thing sound like a compliment.
+ Aww a Chair kiss! Leighton and Ed have been great at keeping the Chair love alive for all their shippers these past years.
+ Blair stayed strong when she heard the news of the crashed plane. Great job on the crying part too, when she realized that Chuck was alive and well.
+ Dan doing the right thing! Go Dan! Plus having Chuck as an inspiration, haha that’s just awesome! Sad thing he couldn’t stop Serena from leaving everyone behind (she is such a selfish girl). Let’s hope his romantic novel will bring her back soon!
+ Yay, for the Battle of the Basses not being a snooze fest anymore!
– The music in the final scene between Bart and Chuck was ridiculous! It made me laugh during this quite dramatic scene. Actually maybe it should be a + after all… it was just plain hilarious! Maybe the writers and music department wanted to admit that too.

4. Rate it! (on a scale from 0 to 10)
Loved the whole team working together, but the ending of the episode (mostly the music) was ridiculous. It’s an 7,5/8 this week.

PS: Get the tissues ready, next week will be the final episode of Gossip Girl! A lot of exciting stuff will happen: a Chair wedding, the aftermath of the battle of the Basses and the reveal of a certain blogger. The latter you can discuss in a our big “Who is Gossip Girl?” poll!

What did you think of this penultimate episode of Gossip Girl?

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