New Girl 2×17: The no-nail oath

New Girl 2x17: Parking Spot

New Girl 2×17: Parking Spot

New Girl 2×17: Parking Spot
Well this was a crazy episode and unfortunately not in a good way. Schmidt discovers a parking spot which comes with the loft in the garage downstairs. The only problem is that they all have a car and there is only one spot. Let the battle being. Winston leaves very soon, because Daisy called him to hook up between work. Which became a total disaster when he forgot to bring a condom. Again Winston scores a homerun when it comes to ridiculous and useless storylines… Although I can imagine that the condom companies and health class teachers were happy with this commercial about safe sex. So let’s repeat the message one more time: If you want to have sex, make sure you use protection! [end message] Back to the parking spot… Nick chickens out very quickly after Winston and becomes the decider. Schmidt and Jess try everything to persuade him (Jess uses her body – hoodies optional – and Schmidt gets devious). When Nick tries to reclaim the parking spot it becomes a car race which turns into the last man/woman standing.

Are you still with me? Yeah I know, it was crazy, boring and not funny at all. The interesting part was Schmidt confronting Jess and Nick about the elephant in the room (a.k.a. the tension between them) and he was not amused. Apparently Schmidt, Nick and Coach signed a no-nail oath when Jess moved in to make sure the dynamic in the loft wouldn’t get ruined by (a failed attempt) to hook up with her. If this storyline wouldn’t have been in the episode my rating would have been a F. But the no-nail oath – which almost as awesome as the douchebag jar – saved the day. Jess and Nick had a few nice talks because of it (except the awful “weird” conversation in the hallway) and Schmidt trying to solve everything by kissing Jess was hilarious. In the meantime we saw Cece making amends with Shivrang, the Indian dude she went on a date with a few episodes ago. This tiny scene will make sense in the next episode. I can’t wait to check that one and forget about the parking spot. – 6,5/7

This week’s favorite quote
Schmidt: “Think that I’m blind? Think I can’t smell it? You think I can’t hear it? The stench of filth and lust is all over this room. Smells like freaking Tijuana.”
Jess: “All right. Fine. I used my body. Is that what you want to hear? I shook what the good
people of Oregon gave me, and I got a parking space.”

Schmidt: “You realize, every second that you don’t run after her, you become more and more of a buttwad, don’t you?”
Jess: “I have a purse full of hard candy and an empty bladder. I’m here all night, folks.”
Schmidt: “I just don’t want my home turning into a den of sexual tension and lies.”
Jess: “Let me be very clear here. I am a strong, self-sufficient woman, and I will not be nailing you, Schmidt, or Nick or Schmidt. Notice I said that twice because I don’t feel it’s sinking in. There will be no nails or screws or hammers in this building area generally, the whole thing.”
Schmidt: “Destiny might be a lady, but victory has a penis.”


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