Television

Suburgatory 2×14: Love Advice

Suburgatory 2×14: T-Ball & Sympathy

Suburgatory 2×14: T-Ball & Sympathy
Now that Tessa and Ryan have survived many moons, Chatswin High starts calling in for love advice. Calling in as a figure of speech, cause they’re literally standing in line in front of a bathroom stall in need of relationship expertise. Bunch of weirdos. Ryan left to a three day away game, so Tessa (currently: Ask Tessa) has plenty of time to mingle in other people’s relationships, whether they like it or not. When Mr. Wolfe announces an upcoming ravioli bar that Chef Alan will be training under a highly gay and (questionably – I might add) attractive ravioligist who just happens to be Alan’s ex-boyfriend… Tessa’s found her new Ask Tessa project. She decides to provide Mr. Wolf with and endless spree of love advice. Which, we can all agree on, is not the best idea. Mainly because I’m still desperately trying to erase the image of Mr. Wolfe in tight purple shorts, but also because she suspects Alan of cheating. Or is she right? And is she aware of the fact that all this Dr.Love extravanganza might just be a distraction from her own relationship problems? We might need to double check if there even is something as a three day away game…

Then there’s also the ongoing vendetta between Dallas and Noah. Ever since Carmen has returned to the Royce residence, Noah has been furious about that. He’s determined to pay Dallas back by stealing away each and every one of her specialists, starting off with her hair dresser and probably ending with growing his own lady parts. Since ‘losing’ is not in the Dallas Dictionary, she decides to steal away Noah’s last and only thing he enjoys, coaching a T-Ball team, by coaching a T-Ball team herself. George is getting tired of this feud between his girl and best friend, but agrees on a match in hopes that it will end the war once and for all. In realization that fancy runs and pink silky outfits might not be Dallas’ ticket to victory, George decides to help the team get ready for the match. The new coaching duo winds up realizing what’s most important: winning or having fun. This cliché moral in the end, combined with the absence of Ryan and Dalia is what makes the episode exactly like Dallas’ new highlights: not beautiful, just satisfactory. – 7

This week’s favorite quote
– Mr. Wolfe: “I know what you’re thinking and yes he was Chef Alan’s first homosexual lover. *Absolute silence* I’m gonna let that sink in for a moment.”
– Dallas: “Carmen was returned to my employ by Father Christmas.”
– Tessa: “There’s nothing you want to… Ask Tessa? Trademark pending.”
– Tessa: “I wouldn’t say anything if I wasn’t 100% sure.” Lisa: “Some of us are a little shy of 100%, some of us are hovering around 12%.”

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